Psychoanalyse This!

Of moving, again.

2007-02-23T23:39:00.000+08:00

Yes I know I'm the pettiest person alive.

I've moved, again.

Show me some love and update your blogroll mmkay?

Of gotting the magic stick.

2007-02-15T21:13:00.000+08:00

So in case you didn't know and was wondering, I was assigned to teach at Eunos Primary for 4 days till Friday. It's been manageable so far only because my lessons got disrupted by things like a visit to a hydroponics farm. (Side note: I was paid to go for another excursion. I'm the luckiest relief teacher around.)

But today, today I had a full day with them. Like 5 periods STRAIGHT with the same class, same bunch of clamorous little brats insistently demanding attention. During this tumultuous time however, I found the magic stick. My saviour, the holy grail: that long wooden piece of whiteboard ruler. The one that makes a tight satisfying orgasmic "piak!" capable of resonating silence. Now I am fearless. I am invincible. No more "'Cher he beat my head!" and no more little piglets relentlessly running around. I am in control. For only 5 minutes.

But I've got the magic stick. Uhuh uhuh. And unlimited ammunition of "piaks!".

Unless.. they develop some form of immunity over it. *horror theme song* Note to self: use "piak!" ammo sparingly, and only in dire circumstances.

PIAK. (Syiok I tell you..)

I received a call from them earlier and apparently, the teacher on leave decided she is on a roll and thought she might as well take another month off. So now they are offering me to join their friendly forces of teachers for a month. If they have told me yesterday, I would've said no outright but today, the magic stick has given me hope. Am I up for it? I honestly don't know. I have to give my answer by tomorrow. May the force be with me.

Of little devils from the deepest depths of hell.

2007-02-14T20:42:00.000+08:00

This is a plea for help. To anyone who knows how to deal with ~~children~~ over-pampered, whiny, bratty little devils from the deepest depths of hell, please do not hesitate to come down to Eunos Primary tomorrow. I'd appreciate your help.

Of no longer being the crazy art teacher.

2007-02-09T21:29:00.000+08:00

So my 2-and-a-half weeks stint at Bedok Green is over. Just when I was getting used to waking up early. Just when I was getting comfortable with the surroundings, the crazy antics of colleagues, the stares and "Hi 'cher!"s, the canteen food, the staff toilet which is oh-so-far away from the art room. Just when I was starting to remember names. Just when I'm getting chummy with the Heads. My time is over. Two and a half weeks is just too painfully short, but I'm happy I was given the chance. The people I meet are amazing and the inspiration I got from the art lessons is invaluable. I'm happy. :)

My week's been pretty. Dinner with Suf and Sofi can never go wrong. I love you guys. And the TPJC gang, I love you too. Have a safe trip back to Aussieland, Ais. You take care and till we meet again.

What now?

Of wimpy me.

2007-02-01T19:06:00.000+08:00

I had a good overwhelmingly emotional cry just now over something so stupid. Was watching American Idol and saw the part where an old man got 300 signatures to petition for him to audition, even though he's too old, all for his wife, who just succumbed to her cancer two days before. So while watching him sing, I cried. And I continued crying like a little baby minutes after that scene. And all the while in my head, while I was still crying, I was trying to figure out why I'm wailing like my pet chicken died.

Haha, really it's funny. But it felt so good after that. Don't you just feel warm and fuzzy after a good cry? Like after watching a good sad story?

Yea here's to wimpy me.

P.S. I love my job.

Of real deals and good things that don't last.

2007-01-27T23:52:00.000+08:00

I haven't been to Esplanade in a long long time and when we were there just now to have a surprise celebration for Weewee, there was a live band! Okay I know I sound like I'm more excited about the band than the party but I'm not! Honest! It is so nice to chill by the river and listen to live music. The band wasn't that bad either. Some guy named Reza Salleh from KL sang and wrote the songs. He has to go change his name but otherwise he's not bad. Go check him out.

So did I tell you guys that I love my job? I do! I love it! So what do I do, you ask? I'm relieving the Head of Art because apparently he's gotta go re-serve the nation for slightly more than two weeks. "But you don't take art!" I hear you ask. Well yea I didn't, and technically I'm not teaching. See in that school, there's only 1 permanent art teacher and yea, that's the person I'm replacing. He has, though, under him, 2 relief teachers and 1 art assistant (his aide whom he hired) to help him around the house (or school or wadeva). So my job is to help the art assistant while she takes over his teaching duties. So I'm the assistant of the assistant. How cool is that?? Okay not cool? Wait till you hear this.

So I can't teach art right, because I don't have art background and all. So what I do is to help the art assistant and sometimes the other relief teachers whenever I can, like maintaining discipline and collecting assignments and things like that. And the cool part is, I get to learn about art! I get to learn whatever is being taught, like drawing skills, how to use colour, proportions, Van Gogh, Picasso, Expressionism and cool things like that! It's like I'm getting paid to attend classes!

And my colleagues? They're not only fun to work with, but they are the real deal. Like the art assistant, she graduated from NAFA and majored in Painting and she and her dad have a gallery in Jalan Pinang and Melaka and she have sold her paintings for close to a thousand bucks each! Her dad has sold his paintings for a couple of thousand dollars! How amazing is that? They are the real deal!

And you know what, the art department is involved in this thing called the Learning Festival held next week where the students come to school and do fun stuff like paint and build sculptures and I get to facilitate and do council-ish stuff and get paid doing it!

I just feel so blessed but so sad that it's gonna be for just 2 weeks. Good things don't last do they?

Of promising things.

2007-01-22T23:49:00.000+08:00

Things are looking good indeed. Finally I've been getting calls to relief teach. Ping Yi Secondary called this morning but apparently I can't, 'cause I've got Eunos Primary to teach. And just just now, some Head of Art person from Bedok Green Secondary called. I have a meeting with him tomorrow. Wee. Sounds promising. We'll see. Good night!

Of bhangra and psycho-ing little chirren.

2007-01-21T22:08:00.000+08:00

Yeap, that's roughly how we danced last night at Seetal's 21st birthday party. Okay fine, that's how we always dance. Horrendous, but damn fun. Haha. Seetal's party was like straight out of a Bollywood movie. You can imagine all the maasis and the maami gees and everyone dancing to bhangra. Who needs alcohol when there's bhangra? But of course it was kinda weird to dance when the grandmas are watching. We wouldn't wanna give them a heart attack now, do we Suf? ;) And I've never seen Sofi so high. She went from bhangra to joget to robo! Haha I had so much fun lah!

So what have I been up to eh? Still sorta jobless. I did get to relief teach at Eunos Primary. And you guessed it, of all the subjects in the whole wide world, I had to teach Malay. Can someone please kindly tell me what 'waiter' is in Malay? I had no friggin' idea and I had to embarrass myself in front of a Primary 2 kid. Teaching's fun though. Just not Malay.

So besides humiliating myself, I've been hanging out mostly with the TPJC councilors, ever since Cass and Ais got back from Aussieland. Cass already left and woman, you better come back in June. You owe me a date this time round.

And I've got tons of reading to do, thanks to Nuvul! Went over to her place with Ais the other day and it was like a library but even better, because she has all the books I've been wanting to read, readily available for me to pick and choose! So as you can see I've set up a sidebar for all the books I've borrowed and I will get down to read each and every single one. Wee!

Okay gotta go sleep now. I have little chirren to psycho tomorrow. This time, I'm bringing my kamus dwibahasa.

Of going togedder-gedder.

2007-01-11T22:14:00.000+08:00

MOSAIC Music Festival is back again! I am so going for Yo La Tengo, Rachael Yamagata and Tristan Prettyman's concerts! Who wants to go with me and Addie?? Let's go together-gether!

But.. Yamagata's and Prettyman's are on the same day lah! Gotta buy the 10pm one for Prettyman. I need money!

Of being fine.

2007-01-09T20:06:00.000+08:00

Go ahead, ask me how I am. I'm fine.

I'm fine. I have been holding myself back from getting myself a job because I've been having driving lessons back to back. I have tolerated grueling sessions with uncle from hell a.k.a. my driving instructor. I woke up at 6 in the morning to get ready for my lesson at 7. I actually had lesson at seven, yeah seven, in the morning. I had psycho-ed myself into thinking that I've mastered the art of cranking or whatever lame-ass shit you call driving through that narrow son-of-damned-pork crank course is. And despite me being good ALL week, believing very much that karma will gun me down on my driving test, I still failed. Yes ladies and gentleman, I failed my driving test for the second time in a row. I'm a failure! I'm retarded! Oh yes I'm smart enough to survive 15 years of education but I can't pass a simple driving test, which even my mom aced! I'm a failure! FAILURE!! F-A-I-L-U-R-E! FAAAILLLUURRREE!!

(God, heart pain sial.)

Of things that matter.

2007-01-04T01:19:00.000+08:00

All that really matters is company, ain't it?

Of detachment and solitude.

2007-01-01T23:23:00.000+08:00

So December has come and December has gone.

What I thought was going to be a month devoted in its entirety to hedonism, partying and catching up with friends turned out to be a month of solitude with lots of spare time to catch up on my readings, tv shows, try fun little games like "House Arrest" and "How Long Can You Go Without Touching The Computer?" and even do a little bit of soul-searching. Very fun things. Try it. Highly recommended. And sometimes, as an added bonus, when you haven't had a decent conversation with anything remotely human in a long time, you get to catch yourself talking to yourself! Finally my alter-ego is manifesting!

Have you ever felt so detached from society that you begin to have flashbacks of embarrassing moments in your life? No? Let me tell you, not a good combination.

So, it's the new year and I'm getting my life back on track. Time to go look for a job.

Let's not be bitter anymore.

Of chemical parties and double whammies.

2006-12-26T13:25:00.000+08:00

So Christmas was shitty. Not that I celebrate it anyway.

I was down with a really bad case of food poisoning. My anal hole was like a dam for sewerage (note: no solid substance, at all) and I barfed, twice. And once I did a Double Whammy. At 6 in the morning. I hate barfing. The uncontrollable forced regurgitation of stomach acids up your throat and down your nose and tears flowing from your eyes. I swear if fluids could gush out your ears, it would. Gives 'chemical party' a whole new meaning eh? Makes me wonder how bulimics do their thing.

And the worst part is, I missed Cassie's party! Cassandra Andrews, I am so happy you're back! I was really, really looking forward to the party I can't believe I missed it! I had to fall sick on Christmas! We must hook up soon okay?

I'm sorry I missed all the phone calls yesterday. Body was too weak to even answer the phone. Had nothing in my system and the fever and the chills and the diarrhoea... Only today was there a trace of semi-solids in my stool. Okay, too much information there right?

Time to make a few phone calls and down some pills. And make plans for New Year's Eve. Anybody got plans?

Of barfing and earworms.

2006-12-25T01:40:00.000+08:00

I fell asleep really early just now but woke up with a start.

After what felt like a full eight hours of sleep, I woke up and realised that it was only midnight. I only slept 3 hours. And boy do I feel sick. Shouldn't have gobbled down that whole pack of kerepek just now. And soon after I woke up I received a flurry of sms-es wishing me Merry Christmas. I'm Muslim darlings but thanks for the wishes anyway. Happy holidays to you guys.

This song is stuck in my head though so please go ahead, click the play button and party!

Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall

Man do I feel sick. I think I'm gonna barf.

Of guilty pleasures and psychic moments.

2006-12-21T01:51:00.000+08:00

So I went to watch Eragon with Weewee and Weiqi and it was a terribly predictable movie but I am a sucker for fantasy stories so I love it. I will get my hands on the book, even though I have tons more to go before I should be buying more, but I'm sick and tired of the heavy stuff and am missing, craving, my fantasy guilty pleasure. Weewee I want to borrow your Pierce's books and anybody willing to lend me Gaiman's and/or Pratchett's stuff (Cupcake??) please please do not hesitate to drop me a line. I promise I'll be nice and won't christen them a new name.

So I Wikipedia-ed Eragon and guess what I found out: Christopher Paolini was only 15 when he started the book and it got published when he's 19. Good God aren't young Americans suppose to go around trying to repeatedly lose their virginity at that age?

That aside, something really weird/cool/weird happened after the movie. Met a bunch of Weewee's friends and we decided to have dinner together, so right, we were exiting Lido's carpark and the car was going down the spiral passageway thingamajig they have in carparks, and I had this fleeting thought of the car getting into an accident and then just ONE second later.. yeap we bumped into the car in front of us. It was a major X-Files moment I tell you. I knew there was a psychic in me somewhere.

So what are YOUR psychic stories? Share them here on Psychoanalyse This! and we will discuss them next week, same time, same place. We look forward to hearing from you.

Good night people!

Of Mr. Rain and Miss Sunshine.

2006-12-20T12:43:00.000+08:00

I see the sun! I see the sun! I see the sun!!!

Okay rain is nice and all but hey Mr. Rain, I know you're going on a rampage and all but sometimes, you just gotta learn how to cool it! I think it's high time you stop pouring your hearts out and let Miss Sunshine play a little! Stick to doing your thing at night will you? Aaah it's good to see you again you great ball of light!

I'm going out!

Of migrating and crickets.

2006-12-18T22:46:00.000+08:00

So I've moved.

Some people have been complaining that they don't want to have to sign up for Vox to leave comments, so I have painstakingly transferred each and every post here, just to make them happy. And plus, I kinda have a lot of time in my hands.

I was contemplating between Blogger and Wordpress, both has their pros and cons, but Blogger has greater functionality so screw good looks for now. Unless I get fickle, again. Vox will be missed but it won't stay idle. Will primarily be using it to upload songs because really, it is the only place that can. The beauty of Vox. You guys are gonna miss it.

So what have I been occupying myself with this past few days, I hear you ask? Well besides migrating my entire post collection, I have been spending time at home, supposedly catching up on my Spanish and Intro to Econs online courses, but more really reading Life of Pi and more really really having a Gilmore Girls season 3 marathon on DVD (thanks Nurul!). The weather's been perfect for this occasion. I love stormy weathers on days like this. Beautiful rainy day, good book, good show, warm bed and if you notice, crickets are chirping!

Quick, just switch off the music, the lights, stick your head out the window and listen to the crickets and think of all the nice things in the world!

Of walruses and chances.

2006-12-11T21:18:00.000+08:00

"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes - and ships - and sealing-wax -
Of cabbages - and kings -
And why the sea is boiling hot -
And whether pigs have wings."

A little quote from one of my favourite movies when I was younger, Harriet the Spy. I remember picking up the book back in the old Bedok library. It was the first novel I ever completed and liked. And soon after reading it I saw it on tv. What are the chances of you reading a book and then (without knowing beforehand) catching it on tv soon after?

P.S. That little quote is originally from Through the Looking-Glass by Lewis Carroll.

Of being a travel couch potato.

2006-12-11T20:43:00.000+08:00

So I was bumming around at home and channel surfing when I came across 5 Takes: USA. I knew about it from the original 5 Takes, which I love, but I never got the chance to see this one. So I watched it and saw this TJ whom I thought was really familiar, until his name came on screen: Bevis. Bevis! I know him! I actually met him when I crashed Shi Hsin University when I was over in Taiwan! Don't believe me? I have proof!

See! That's him! Ok fine, I don't know him well enough to be taking pictures with him but hey I sure can say I've met him. Wow, I can't believe he's a TJ now, getting to travel and all. Officially jealous. I would've gone for the 5 Takes audition if not for stupid army. Yeah right.

I wanna travel the world!!

Of mental notes and tipsy fun.

2006-12-09T01:00:00.000+08:00

So it has been a week since I've gotten my independence.

KL was a drag but the long rides back and forth were solacing. Stuff over there wasn't so cheap, contrary to what I thought. Note to self: never go shopping with mom, as enticing as using her credit card could be. Another note to self: never go on a trip with mom. Note to friends: when are we gonna travel together??

Cupcake's party was a blast! I haven't seen Lee and Rizwan and Samuella and Cupcake and Natnut in a long loooong time and we all get to meet and celebrate 2 of my most favourite crazy people's birthdays all together and meeting new people and getting (naturally) tipsy was mighty fun. Pictures!

Cupcake and Natnut and pretty people all around.

Camwhoring.

When Cupcake gets high.

Aah break's been good. 80% of my room is cleaned up and a lot of things to look forward to. S208 class gathering, play dates with Suf and gang, outings with Aisyah and the rest of the councillors, and tomorrow.. zoukOut! Wee!

Of going away last minute.

2006-12-03T16:03:00.000+08:00

This is truly last minute but I'm going away to KL for a few days. I just bought the ticket, bus leaves in 2 hours and I haven't pack my bags yet.

I'll be back Tuesday! Miss me while I'm gone!

Isk.

Of sleeping and bittersweet endings.

2006-12-01T23:18:00.000+08:00

I spent the whole day sleeping. And I had one word to describe it. Damn shiok. Okay fine that's two words, but it really was.

Woke up at 12, went for Friday Prayers, came back and sleep some more. And when I woke up again, spent a couple of hours just curling up in bed. Aaah.. Damn shiok I tell you.. Freedom sure is sweet.

I didn't really plan to just laze around today but circumstances at home made me have no other choice. Parents are being a bitch and I'm exercising my form of peaceful protest. I call it the be-in-bed strike.

Anyway, my last day at Gramophone was.. bittersweet. Pictures.

We had dinner after work and what I thought was just gonna be a simple dinner and goodbyes turned out to be something bigger. Supervisor invited ex-colleague and another colleague from another branch as well. Just because I'm leaving. Wow. And everything was paid for. I didn't know I was so loved. Haha. To think that I've only been there three weeks. The HR Manager called Supervisor and she passed the phone to me. He was quite shocked that we were having a party for me and then told me that if I ever wanna come back and work for them, I'm always welcomed. So sweet right? Sighs.. It sucks having to leave such a wonderful bunch of people. Oh well.

So there it is ladies and gentlemen. My very short and bittersweet story of my first full-time job.

Of getting hitched and rusted penknives.

2006-11-28T22:10:00.000+08:00

Suf just told me she got attached. Of course naturally I thought she was kidding, but I guess my instincts were right. (So I DID smell something fishy huh Suf?)

I'm happy and sad. You just have to get attached when I'll be having more free time to hang out right? Can't you guys hook up later on when I get busy or something? ;p Kidding, love.

Nigel, if you are reading this, I just wanna let you know that if I hear ANY complaints from Suf, I. will. mutilate. your. genitals. with. my. rusted. penknife. And make you cry like a woman divorced seven times. But I still wanna get into Sheares okay, pretty pretty please?? *smiles my innocent smile*

Hey Suf, don't, or at least try not to, drift away from us and especially me, okay? I've lost one too many people this way.

On a brighter note, Nigel! Habis! Your life will never be peaceful no more! Hahaha I'm so happy for you guys!

Of visits and assets.

2006-11-27T00:55:00.000+08:00

I've written my resignation letter. My official last working day as a Sales Assistant at Gramophone would be on 30 November 2006.

Second thoughts? A little.

Supervisor B asked if I've made a decision and I told her that I've decided to leave. She paused a little and then said, "Please leave at the end of the month. I'd like to have a little gathering before you go."

Senior Staff B went, "Isk! I miss you already! Now no one's gonna dance with me!"

Intern went, "You're unfair! You're supposed to leave in February with me.." in her adorable Filipino accent.

Gosh. Didn't know I was such an asset. Harharhar.

If only the hours weren't so long and job wasn't so mundane. It sucks having to leave them. But now's not the time for regrets. I've made my decision and I'm contented.

Cupcake asked if I like my job, aside from the long hours and some odd people I have to work with. I gave it a thought and realised, no, I don't like what I have to do. The constant smiling, having to deal with millions of unworthy strangers every day. Maybe I could grow to like it. I would know better where things are and give better recommendations to customers and feel good about myself having satisfy their needs. Have your very own regular customers and all. But then again I never intended to stay there long-term. So what the hell. At this current moment, I don't like the job. There's no job satisfaction at all. I mean, yea you helped someone find that elusive song stuck in his head and he appreciates it and buys the CD. But at the end of the day he's gonna forget you anyway. And life goes on.

Achesypants cupcake buttercups, thanks so much for saying what you said just now. It means a lot. I love you.

Thanks to all who visited. Suf and Nigel (you still owe me some of Suf's Embarrasing Stories!), Addie and Mukti (sorry man, it WAS a new copy of The Carpenters dammit!), Sofi and your "surprise" visit (hahaha.. that was funny), Nuvul and Wei Qi (good luck with the application!). I look forward to more visits. Hey, I've still got a week to go.

Of thoughts and predicaments.

2006-11-23T01:13:00.000+08:00

Supervisor handed me the induction form and made me read a whole list of terms and conditions I have to abide by as part of being a full-timer. After that, I had to sign an agreement to indicate that I officially become a slave driver. But I didn't.

What I did was tell Supervisor my situation.

I practically jumped into the working world right after army with minimal break in between.
The long hours are intolerable, considering the fact that I have a myriad of things to do at home.
Things to do includes the essential like clearing up army mess and also the trivial and frivolous; things that make life worth living.
So fundamentally, I am in desperate need of a break. Or at least a job that doesn't take so much of your time.

Supervisor responded very kindly but was disappointed of course.

She said she wanted to keep me.
I was a fast learner and am able to do a 2-men job.
I could handle the pop/rock section well.
She was about to assign me a duty, which was to handle customer orders. Customer orders! I actually wouldn't mind doing that. Finally something exclusive for me to do.
She also added that she wasn't going to be selfish. If I could get a better job out there, she would kindly ask me to get lost and not waste time down here.

So she offered me a few alternatives. I could switch to doing part-time. Or I could quit.

Here's what I think.

I could stay full-time and get paid and let her teach me more things and be given more responsibilities and duties and forge stronger bonds with colleagues and then make it harder for me to quit (which I eventually intend to do).

I could also switch to part-time and have more time for myself but at the same time earn a pathetic amount probably not even reaching my army allowance.

Or I could resign.

I also thought of asking them to give me a few weeks break and let me settle everything at home first before joining them back again, but then it got me thinking, do I really want to be in the sales industry? Work 11 hours a day? No thanks.

Why do I feel so guilty then?

Of job hazards and a certain Q word.

2006-11-21T08:58:00.000+08:00

It's eight in the morning and I couldn't fall back to sleep, which is weird because it is my off day and, as most of you would know, I would do more than anything to just sleep in. But today's different because something's been bugging me and I just cannot let my mind rest until I have a conclusion. It was bugging me so bad that I had to do something about it.

So I picked up my iPod, turned to ok go's 'Here It Goes Again', and started dancing (prancing) in the living room like a maniac while everybody else is sleeping. And it was mighty fun. Haha.

So anyway, I have been working for slightly more than a week now and I've been asking myself this, "If I quit my job, does that make me a quitter?" Now before I delve into this, I'm just gonna briefly elaborate on my life (life?) at work.

Let's start with the characters I'm dealing with.

There are 6 full-timers in total, including me. There's Supervisor A, Supervisor B, Senior Staff A, Senior Staff B, Junior Staff A and then there's me (Junior Staff B, if you like).

Supervisor A's the charmer, the one that everybody likes (and by everybody I mean the staff and the customers). He does all the managing and the supervising and the admin stuff supervisors do. And I don't like him. It is evident he treats the female staff better and he gives double standards to his customers. He is especially polite to customers that are a) gorgeous, b) looks important, c) Caucasian. He gets sarcastic with me and never jokes around with me like he does with the other staff. To sum it all, he is a fake.

Supervisor B's the resident bitch. Or that was what everybody else says. I didn't get to meet her on the first day and everybody was telling me about how I am supposed to "be prepared" when dealing with her and to "adapt" to her needs and be wary of her. I was kind of scared to meet this person until I actually did. She turned out to be one nasty fun person to be with. Yeah well she's sarcastic, bitchy, can't be bothered with disagreeable customers but she's funny. Her jobscope leans more towards the sales aspect of the job. If you see a wrongly stickered price tag, you can quote her saying, "It's okay. Extra money goes in the cash register and then it goes into your bank account." She also taught me a lot of things and I'm afraid she might think of me as her protégé, which makes it harder for me to come up with a decision. She taught me how to categorise the front display. "First two rows compilations, followed by pop/rock, then indie/alternative. Oh and sluts together."

Senior Staff A and B are fun to be around, though A is more chinkeefied but that's okay. He is in-charge of Asian pop anyway. A very resourceful person too and indispensable, because half the time customers are asking for chinkee music and the rest know nuts about it. Senior Staff B is gorgeous, nice, sweet, funny and LAME! Which makes work much much more tolerable. She, Supervisor B and me will do crazy things like dance to George Michael's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-go" and do stupid things to humour ourselves.

Junior Staff A is.. hmm.. Have you guys watched Phil of the Future on Disney Channel? Do you know one of the characters, Debby, Pim's archenemy? That excruciatingly nice, sickeningly sweet, Miss Know-it-all Goody-two-shoes? That's her! She's nice and all, patient even, but sometimes you just. wanna. drive. a. nail. through. her. head.

And then there is the part-timer and the intern. The part-timer is cool, has been working for a couple of months, and Indonesian. She's funny and I can divulge all sorts of information to her without worrying of what she'll think. The full-timers don't really fancy her, because she can be an airhead sometimes. Supervisor B has officially labelled her a 'goblok', which is stupid in Bahasa. But I'm cool with her. Officially my gossip partner.

Have you ever gone to a store, and then noticed that there are Indonesian/Filipino maids working in that store and then you wondered, "Aren't maids not allowed to work in a store?" Tsk tsk you ignorant, assuming, disdainful Singaporeans. The intern in my workplace is from the Philippines and yeah well, her life here ain't better than the maids. She works everyday except Mondays and doesn't even get paid. Only a couple of hundred bucks as allowances and she has a contract of 6 months. She's so gonna miss Christmas at home this year. The intern is also fun to be around and a very nice person to talk to, which we sometimes get carried away doing.

Sometimes I feel I'm closer to the part-timer and the intern than the full-timers. As of now, only the two of them know of my thoughts of quitting.

Now let me tell you about the job per se.

Working there can be fun, especially since I can click with most of my colleagues. We can get high and do crazy things and still maintain a decorum in front of customers, which is almost always hard to do and I end up laughing out of sight of people. See the thing about being in retail is that, you have to keep maintaining a calm cool persona, even when you feel like circumcising the previous customer, because, well, you know the drill. "Great service begins with me!" But then again I never had to deal with difficult customers, because I'll just pass them over to the supervisors and the senior staff.

So you think being in retail is safe? Think again. There are job hazards being in this industry.

Job Hazard 1: The Cash Register
Dangers: Unwary cashiers might suffer mild groin pain to severe impotency from the sudden expulsion of the money drawer. Be warned.

Job Hazard 2: The Repeat Mode
Dangers: Retail associates will suffer a very bad earworm that will last the whole night sometimes even up till the next morning, when which the whole cycle will repeat once you go back to work.

Job Hazard 3: The Price Scanner
Dangers: If cashiers were to lean against the wall behind (to rest or whatever), the price scanner will blind you with its laser beam. I swear this was schemingly done to make sure we stay on our feet for 11 hours straight.

Job Hazard 4: The Shrinkwrap Plastic Sealer
Dangers: Retail associates looking to shrinkwrap CDs will inhale toxic fumes emitted by the burning of the plastic during sealing. Side-effects include getting high, sudden asthma and even possibly lung cancer.

Anyway, what bugs me most right now is that the hours I'm working is really really long. I was told, before I got the job, that it'll be 11am to 9pm daily but that is not the case ladies and gentlement. Because the store closes at 9:30pm and sometimes even later on weekends. And after the store closes, we still have to count money and settle all the sales, which can take up to an hour. So technically I work about 11 hours daily. 11 hours straight without sitting down at all, unless you're eating lunch. I'm fresh out of the army so standing up for a couple of hours is fine. But I'm really really irritated about the fact that they only give me HALF-bloody-freakin'-HOUR to go out and buy food and no, I can't even eat peacefully at the establishment of my choice. I have to take out, bring back to the store, and freaking eat at the back room like a freakin' bag lady!

Now what puzzles me is that, why is it that I am the only one that feels exploited? What happened to the Employment Act and my rights as an employee? Of course I can't bring up the subject. It's either I am given the rights (or maybe not) and be outcasted, or I get fired. Either way, it sucks.

The long hours are just unbearable to me right now. I was looking forward to freedom after army. Was anticipating to redeem my life back. Go swimming again, read a good book in bed, spend hours just lazing around, have dinner with friends, catch up on TV shows, catch up with friends. I promised so many of my friends that I'll be more free after army to hang out but no, I had to go and get myself a job. Working here is like being back to regimentation. Wake up. Go to work. Reach home exhausted. Sleep. Wake up. Go to work. On my off days I'll just be catching up on sleep and be too tired to go out.

Everything happened so fast that I still haven't clear the bags and bags of stuff I brought home from camp. I feel so jaded. I just need more time for myself. I just need to quit, right? But does that make me a quitter? I have heard stories of people juggling school and work and family matters and they push on and everybody respects this kind of people. I myself have scoffed at people who quit their jobs after a few days, thinking they don't have the willpower and thought if I can get through army, I can go through anything. But for the past two days, nothing was on my mind more than that q word.

I posed the question to a couple of people and Suf's reply made me smile. She said, "No. It juz means ur job suck." Thanks babe.

On a different note, I hadn't had so much fun in a long time as on Sofi's birthday. It was the only thing that made me smile, just thinking about it at work. I'm glad I have beautiful friends.

2006-11-18T01:43:00.000+08:00

i miss my life. i miss living.

don't let me drift out of your social radar okay? please?

cry.

Of junk and stuff.

2006-11-09T01:34:00.000+08:00

I brought home so much junk from camp last week that I still have yet to clear/store them.

A list of what I brought home last Saturday:

huge field pack which was used outfield (nope it's not the normal field pack. this one's the super huge one. my normal field pack is inside the roller duffel bag.)
roller duffel bag that was issued to us when first enlisted
an army-issued duffel bag
an army-issued backpack (or "assault" pack as they'd call it. *rolls eyes*)
my Crumpler bag
3 paper bags
1 Ziplock bag
1 bolster pillow (yes I brought my own bolster to camp)

All the bags were fully-packed, fyi. I had to make 2 trips down the elevator and 2 trips out to the car.

So much junk to clear. Not to mention that I have to scrub mud and other gross stuff off them before dumping them in the store. Muh.

Of more good days.

2006-11-07T23:56:00.000+08:00

I'm finally out of the clutches of stupid people. As of today people, I'm a free man. YEAAAAAH!!

Job interview could've been better, but it doesn't matter anymore because I GOT THE JOB! I'm starting this Friday so wish me luck people. Officially my first full-time job. :)

Things are looking so good that I'm worried some stroke of bad karma might just barge in. Things tend to turn out that way, don't they? Insya'Allah, no screw-ups.

Of good days and good days ahead.

2006-11-06T23:40:00.000+08:00

Today is a pretty good day.

I went shopping with Addie and bought myself a nice shirt and a projectshop bag using the voucher I got for my birthday. I love the bag! Despite it being polyester (buek Addie). Thanks Suf, Sofi, Aishah, Raz and Rahman! I'll show you guys the bag when we meet up! It's gorgeous!

We also went to apply for a job at HMV and we were made to do a little mini music quiz and we sorta.. cheated. Haha. I had to refer to my iPod for the names of some albums and artistes and Addie was Wikipedia-ing from her handphone. Haha. Well technically we didn't cheat.. We knew our stuff! It was at the tip of our tongues! We just needed a little bit of help. Who cares how many members there are in The White Stripes anyway? And besides, even if you know we "sought help", oh people at HMV, it shows that we have the initiative and the means to get information on the spot! 100% customer satisfaction guaranteed! Great service begins with me! *smiles*

And then and then before going home we decided to drop by Gramophone and I met a friend's friend who was working there and yeap, we applied over there too. And guess what, we received a phone call right after that when we were in the MRT on the way home and we've got interviews tomorrow! Mine's at 2:30pm at Centerpoint. My first job interview ever!! Wish me luck! Exciting! :D

AND AND AND I'm getting my pink I/C back tomorrow!!! ARMY'S FINALLY OVER!!! Freedooooom!! You have no idea how exciting this is. I still remember when I first enlisted, it was crazy. I had to deal with regimentation and morons and loneliness and confusion. I remembered being bombarded with acronyms like O.C. and C.O. and S.O.C. and C.O.S. and all those B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T. Also not to mention how I suffered some form of post-traumatic disorder. I would wake up at 5:30 in the morning with the thoughts "Where am I? Gotta go get ready, can't be late!" running through my head before realising I was in the comfort of my own bed in my own home. Yes, even when I was at home I would wake up at 5.30 with a start. Even when I was enjoying my weekends, cheesy propagandic army songs would creep into my head and I would cringe and feel sad. I always get the heebie-jeebies on Sunday afternoons, thinking of the terror that lies ahead when I had to book in back Sunday night. I had to rely on my imagination to entertain me during countless marches and trainings. If you're astute, you'd sometimes notice me smiling or humming to myself. Haha. I was probably thinking of all the crazy/random things me and my friends did, like Ekta's penguin dance or Suf and Sofi and everybody else trying to march army-style or something like that. I'm so glad I have lovable crazy friends. If you don't know it, you guys kept me going and kept me sane (yes I know, smilling to oneself is such a sane thing to do). And I wanna thank all of you. :) I love you guys.

Gosh.. Things are looking bright ahead! I have great music (thanks to Addie and my recent shopping for MORE CDs), a nice new bag (finally I have something to substitute my Crumpler), a nice shirt, a job interview at my favourite CD store and.. getting my life back! Things are looking good indeed.

Of long lost friends and anak menantu.

2006-11-05T19:35:00.000+08:00

Birthday party turned out to be a success. :)

I want to thank all of you who came over, even though it was a last minute invitation.

Imran and Saleh, thanks so much for coming. I haven't seen you guys in close to 4 years (occasional bumpings doesn't count) and I have to say I miss you guys. I had fun reminiscing our secondary school days and all the crazy/stupid things we did. We still have a lot of catching up to do. Let's meet up again soon, with the rest of the gang.

Elaine! I'm so sorry that you had to wait so long for.. no one. Most of our classmates couldn't make it and the rest (well, namely IZAH) cancelled on me last minute. Oh well.. But thanks so much for making your way down anyway. We had fun complaining about stupid people and watching Spiderman 2 on HBO didn't we? :) You officially gave me the first birthday present so you must be proud! :p

Ain! I never thought you would be able to come over. I think this is history in the making! This is how it should be like eh? We should be able to hang out at each other's places without our parents bugging us!

Next to come over was.. Aishah! Suf! Sofi! Raz! I love you guys!! I was really really sad and disappointed when you pulled that nasty trick lah! I really believed that NONE of you could make it can! I was already digging on the remaining chicken wings thinking no more people would come and then there you guys were at the door. Haha a pleasant surprise indeed. Thanks sooo much for the gift, I've been wanting to get something from projectshop for the longest time!

Eri and Addie, you guys were.. late! Haha but I'm happy you guys made it. Eri! No present! Haha it's okay lah.. I really wasn't expecting anything and your presence is enough. :) So long never see you already! Addie, because you're the last one to leave, and we shared the cab, now my mom thinks you're her anak menantu (daughter-in-law). Thanks ah.

It was a great day indeed, minus the fact that I had to book in back to camp that night. Thanks guys for making what could've been a miserable day a wonderful one. Thanks also to those who called, sms-ed, email-ed, testimonial-ed and commented on friendster and myspace to wish me happy birthday.

Click for pictures!

One of the better birthdays I had in years. :)

Of firecrackers and money-filled green packets.

2006-10-26T00:31:00.000+08:00

Okay here are pictures of my Eid celebration.

I think this is the first time in a long time that we actually wore same colour outfits. Bleah.

Head over to Nyai's house and met Kak Jija and Ejaz!

After Nyai's house (sadly I didn't take any pictures there), we made our way down to Johor where my maternal grandmother's staying. We reached when they were doing Maghrib prayers and I took a few shots of my uncles and cousins praying together.

More pictures.

The kids had a time of their life with firecrackers. I think the haze index went up by 50 after that.

Giving out green packets time.

And the kids comparing the bounty.

Alright folks. Enough visual candy for today.

Oh wait before that, here's a picture of sis and mom at the end of the day. Haha. Tired!

Of cleaning and faking pretence.

2006-10-24T11:43:00.000+08:00

So I just got back from our Eid prayers at Toa Payoh Stadium and everything's turning out okay. The after-prayers socialising wasn't as bad as I fathom it would be. Met some of my old madrasah friends and they were lame. Okay fine, I was being lame along with them so it was kinda fun. I wish I'd brought my camera with me so I can show you how colourful it was, and everyone praying in unison. It was flattering and humbling at the same time.

So for those of you who don't know, it's one of the two Muslim festivals today here in Singapore! Internationally known as 'Eid-ul-fitr, locally spelt as Aidilfitri and more known as Hari Raya (Day of Celebration) in Malay, it's a day where we celebrate our victory after Fasting for a month. Personally, I feel that this fasting month wasn't as good as the previous ones. I dunno, I felt like I wasn't, erm, "in tune" with God as much as I would like to be. So that means I don't deserve to be celebrating this day eh? Haha that'll save me the trouble of house-visiting and faking pretence with cousins and relatives I only meet once a year and responding the same way to the same questions of "So when will Army end?" and worse, "So when are you taking your O-levels?" (Do I really look 15??). And and the shame of getting money-filled green packets. Yeah right.

Mum's bugging me to clean the house (yes even on the day itself, even when we have been cleaning for the past few days) and as much as I would like to, she makes it as though people visiting our house will search for a speck of dust and say, in their hearts or not, "Aha! My house is cleaner than yours!" It's a holiday man.. People should just learn to chill and enjoy the day.

Alright here's to more cleaning and then I'm off to visit dear grandmas and relatives! Happy Aidilfitri people!

Of money and breaks.

2006-10-18T01:07:00.000+08:00

I just watched the entire season 1 of Grey's Anatomy on DVD and I love it. I know it's a bit too late for me to start gushing about it now but excuse me, I spent two years frolicking around in the jungle and making friends with grass and mud so forgive me if I don't keep up with the latest tv series. I need to get my hands on season 2. I need money. I need to find a job.

Army's ending really soon and I've been doing a lot of thinking about what I'm gonna do. And mostly it involves a lot of money. Please let my 9-month break be a good one.

Of spring cleaning and memories.

2006-10-12T20:25:00.000+08:00

I was spring cleaning my room and I saw this in my Secondary 1 Design & Technology workbook. Yes dear friends, I still have my Sec 1 D&T workbook.

If this question is posed to me right now, I would've answered: a) iTunes b) iPod.

Of crazy and spazzed moments.

2006-10-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

We celebrated Aishah's 20th birthday at Seoul Garden Ngee Ann City and it was fun. I would have said it with more zing and elaborated on all the crazy things that happened (like Suffirah confessing her being lesbian to unsuspecting strangers and that shop called Nan Bei) but I'm really annoyed at my spazzed laptop. It has, oh good people of the world, ran out of memory space! I know! All 30GB used up! Okay, I know 30GB is pretty measly for a hard disk drive but my iBook has been working hard and has been pretty good ever since it was passed down from my sis to me. So now I have to find a way to clear some space. Bah. I can't even create an iMovie with the videos I took last night. Just when I thought I could upload my first video to YouTube.

Speaking of YouTube, Addie uploaded something she shouldn't have. I would've killed her if not for the memories it brought back. I have a few videos myself and will upload them up soon enough. In the mean time, for everyone who experienced it, or not, enjoy.

Oh by the way, I love how the haze made Singapore look like Genting Highlands last night.

Man, look at the time. I'm supposed to be sleeping right now. I have to regulate my body clock so I don't wake up zombified Tuesday morning for my driving test. Wish me luck people.

Of school and morons.

2006-10-01T00:35:00.000+08:00

I received an email from the National University of Singapore Office of Admissions and they have invited me for a talk regarding early matriculation for returning national servicemen offered a place there. That is to say instead of starting school in August like everybody else, we "returning national servicemen" get to start earlier, sometime in May due to the shortened NS period.

I was mildly excited upon receiving the email. It re-confirms the fact that I have got accepted to NUS, something to look forward to after army, and I really am looking forward to start school again. 2 years of mingling with morons is enough. Give me stuck-up intellectuals anyday.

I have sorta made up my mind quite sometime ago not to go with the early intake programme. I mean, I've had enough interaction with guys (moronic or otherwise) for the past 2 years. I don't need to go through my freshmen orientation with another bunch of testosterone-driven people. And I just can't stand it when people start comparing notes about their army life. Gag me with a fork.

So I'll start school in August thank you very much. And besides, it gives me more time to work and travel and do the things I love.

Of tests and travellers.

2006-09-22T00:58:00.000+08:00

Omg. Today is such a coincidental/fateful day. I was just browsing through my email and was reading comet by lonelyplanet and it featured and article written by Tony Wheeler, whom I found out later on was the co-founder of lonely planet. Later in the evening, just when I was about to go home from Wheelock Place to change by iBook battery, I saw this ang moh couple giving a talk to a bunch of audience. I decided to be kaypoh and to my much surprise, it was Tony and Maureen Wheeler, giving a book talk on their book "the lonely planet story". I was ecstatic and awed and inspired by their stories, and even braved myself and asked if there was a point in time where they couldn't stand each other and what were the sacrifices they made travelling as a couple. I couldn't really remember what she said now, I was too shaken up after I realised I actually asked them a question in front of a crowd. She said something along the line "it was just last week when they were crossing England, all 364km of it and she had mud up to her knee and something like that. There was also one occasion when they were in India and they had an argument and they were louder than the Indians and she flung her bag to him and said "I'm leaving!" and Tony said, "You can't!" and she said "I am!" and he said "but your passport's with me, you just threw it at me." Haha I thought that was pretty funnny. So she continued saying something like if there is an instability in your relationship, travelling together is a good way to see if you shoud stay together. So more people asked more questions and they answered and then it was the autograph session and my impulse took over and I bought the book and they signed and I was damn sad that I didn't have a camera with me but we used Adleens camera phone which was so blurry. There was this woman in front of me queueing at the cashier who kept smiling at me and finally she asked if I was gonna travel with Adleen and I was like "Nooo.. Oh by any chance do you have a camera?" and she was like unfortunately no and then she buat bodoh. haha I was so desperate for a camera can. but oh well. at least I got their autograph. they're such and inspiration to me. what a prime time to come, when i'm all hyped up about my gap year and everything. Can't wait to start travelling on my own. I'm so gonna devour the book.

Talking about my gap year, went to look for jobs with Raz. Applied to Kelly Services and Recruit Esxpress. Hope to get a good job with at least $6/h. I calculated that if I earn $4.50 an hour for 2 months and start relief teaching from Jan till June, I'll only earn a total of $2900 after deducting all my expenses. Not enough for a round the world trip! How depressing! If Tony and Maureen can do it, I'll come up with something. We'll see how it goes. Need to start planning real soon. Till next time. Cheerios! Telor bungkus yummy.

Of coincidences and ironies.

2006-09-21T23:55:00.000+08:00

It was a normal (boring) out-of-camp day and I was typically assuaging my compulsive need to go online. So while browsing through endless newsletters in my email, I saw one from Lonely Planet. It featured the co-founder of Lonely Planet himself, Mr. Tony Wheeler. I was surprised that Lonely Planet had like, a founder. I know. All the while I thought these books just materialise from thin air right down to the bookshelves ready for sale. No really, I thought a giant like Lonely Planet must have started from, I dunno, a corporation of travel agencies or something. Something big, you know? Never thought it could be a brainchild of a founder. Okay, two co-founders.

So I didn't put it much thought and went about my daily life. Went job-hunting and then to town to get my fire-hazard-no-more battery from Apple. And when I went down the escalators right next to Borders, I saw a mass of people conglomerating near the entrance and I decided to kaypoh abit and go take a look see. And lo and behold, there I saw right in front of my eyes, talking, breathing, living and giving a speech on their book, Tony and Maureen Wheeler! Okay I didn't know it was them when I first saw them, I admit. Had to discern from the question and answer session they were having. When I found out I was ecstatic to the point of going psycho. ("OH MY GOD I just read about him THIS MORNING on the internet!!") Really, Addie can vouch for that. Talk about co-incidences. There and then I decided to get the book (with money I'm supposed to be saving for my world trip, how ironic) and get it autographed.

Not wanting to let the chance slip by, I wanted a picture with them and I almost killed myself for not bringing a camera with me. I know, me, cam-whore, no camera. I even asked the stalker girl in front of me in the cashier queue if she had a camera I could borrow but no, she didn't. So I had to settle with Addie's measlier-than-thou camera phone. And I had to pass it to some girl with Parkinson's.

I know this could've been a picture of me and my grandparents on a trip to Sweden with a Scandinavian girl for all you know, but no, it is really me and Addie and the Wheelers.

The Wheelers, by the way, are amazing. Having been travelling together since their twenties, they have survived with twenty-seven cents in their pockets, had two kids (and still travelling, mind you) and ended up running a multinational company. They are the real deal. Backpackers with NO Lonely Planet to guide them.

Of trees and sounds.

2006-09-18T14:58:00.000+08:00

So I was bored and posed the classic philo question to a bunch of random people a couple of days ago. I thought I'd share some of their replies.

"Do you think trees make a sound when they fall if there's no one around?"

I've got people stating the obvious.
Nurul: Yup they do
Naweera: Er ya..i should think so. haha.

I was surprised that this came from Miss Thiang, the philo major.
Miss Thiang: Jus cos no one was there to hear doesn't mean that molecules in the air didn't vibrate.

Suffirah said no though.
Suffirah: No. Cos there's no one 2 hear it. R u plannin 2 take philosophy? Or r u juz plain bored?

Some were quite hesitant.
Syikin: Is tis a trick qn?

Nabilla thinks that the question should've been "What made the tree fall?" and to which she said, "why aren't more ppl concerned abt that?? conservation, ppl!"

And I've got some pretty quirky answers which I love.
Aishah Jr: Erm.. They say 'ouch'?
Ramlee: Huh? Like what? Groaning and moaning sounds?

But my favourite will have to be from Nat Nut. She said:

I suppose they do. I mean when no one's ard, they hv all é more reason to b loud, isnt it? Self-expression n all tt jazz...

Haha!

Of gnomes and transvestites.

2006-09-18T04:12:00.000+08:00

I'd like to begin by sharing with you this mini-film I saw while browsing through YouTube.com. If you have 15 minutes to spare, watch the whole thing. It's inspiring, heart-warming and sad. And plus Lauren Graham is such a joy to watch. And come on, I know you guys just love looking at transvestites, admit it. Prepare your popcorns (or I'd rather not, 'cause they're crunchy and hampers your hearing). Enjoy.

To 206.

2006-08-15T13:41:00.000+08:00

100 Years – Five for Fighting

This Is The Last Time - Keane

Shy That Way – Tristan Prettyman & Jason Mraz

The realisation that NDP was over only hit me when I saw the repeat telecast of the parade on television. A bit laggy eh? But what many of you said when I asked, on the actual day, if you guys were excited, it’s true to an extent. It did feel just like another rehearsal. So when that realisation hit me, I was like “Yes! My Saturdays are free again!” but at the same time, haha, I thought “Oh my God, I’m never gonna see these kids again!” Yea. I’m gonna miss you guys so much. In the flurry midst of rehearsals and preparations for NDP, my social life came to a halt and rehearsals became my asylum from the morons I see in camp everyday. Yes you guys are ten times smarter, less annoying, more appealing to be with than the people in camp. So despite me having to carry stores for you guys and everything, I enjoyed every moment spent together and I thank you for that.

I am very bad at making speeches. I had so much that I wanted to say in the bus on the last day but I couldn’t form the words that were in my head. I really wished I could’ve said something more than a mere thanks. I really do hope though that you guys felt my sincere appreciation when I received the gift from you guys.

I’d like to extend the thanks in this form of letter. How I wish I can cover each and every one of you in 206 but time didn’t allow me to get to know all of you in person. Having said that, my thanks go to EACH AND EVERYONE of you.

First and foremost, I’d like to thank of course, the Class Chairman, Wen Xuan for being the most responsible Sec 2 guy I know. Seriously, it’s hard to find really responsible people nowadays and being it at such a young age, you’ll grow to be a fine person. I know a lot of people my age (and even older!) that don’t even have half the sense of responsibility you have. You’re a gem and without you, my job would have been a lot harder and I wouldn’t have as much fun with 206. Keep up the good work and all the best to you. Just take care of your knee okay? Thanks for stepping up, taking initiative and being a leader.

Serene, vice-chairman, class lame queen. Haha. I enjoyed every moment of our “talk crap” sessions in the bus, at the stadium and whenever we had to wait for long hours before rehearsal starts. The first vivid impression I have of you was when you tried opening that wet tissue when you wanted to touch your nose with your tongue. You remember? Haha. You’re really a tomboy! Besides being such a joy to be with, you also struck me as a person who doesn’t need to be told what to do. It was when one of the army personnel asked for 2 guys to help carry food and water and stuff, and you questioned him, “why girls cannot carry meh?” and you went right ahead and grabbed the plastic bag and walked off. That’s an attitude I really admire and if you continue to speak your mind and practice what you believe in, you will go a long way. Thanks for all the entertainment, the lame jokes, the gossip.

Joel, Joel, Joel.. What can I say about you? The reputation of 206 is in your hands. Haha. Really. I think when people think of 206, they think of Joel. And all for the wrong reasons. I still remember the first day I was at Nan Hua trying to get you guys to rehearse; you were always running around and disappearing (and you still do at every rehearsal!). And I remember seeing you getting punished by teachers again and again. “Joel and gang.” Haha. You are a leader in your own way. You are the rebel, but without you I don’t think 206 would be as much fun. Honestly I think that the heart and soul of 206 lies in you. You can make things happen if you want to. As much as teachers are irked by you, I think you’re the only person in class that can get along with anybody! The rebel that gets along with everybody. You’re a living irony!

Shu Huan! Stop dao-ing me! Haha. You and your outrageously funny depictions of teachers (especially Mr. Liu and Ms. Yap!). And of course not forgetting your eternal quest to be the most civilised person in the world! Thanks for making my days in Nan Hua so entertaining! I also admire your determination in proving people wrong. I remember you carrying that box of water for so long! Even I can’t carry it that long without flinching!

Shi Min, I officially give you the award for being the most civilised person in 206! Haha! Oh Shu Huan don’t be jealous; you just cannot make it. Haha!

Yee Chin! How’re things going between you and Damien? Haha! One thing I never will forget about you is your crazy antics! How you annoy Serene and Shu Huan is just hilarious!

Hong Xuan. Sighs. You’re a handful. But at the same time you add that zest to 206! You and your fascination with promiscuity amuse me. Haha! I remember when I was in charge for group V W X; you were the most difficult to control! You were running around catching frogs and insects for goodness sake! And it was horror of all horrors when I saw you in 206. I was like “oh no, not him!” Haha. But you grew on me. When you were absent for one of the rehearsals, I actually missed your presence. You have that endearing quality that just needs a little getting used to. I’m glad I got to know you more in 206! You turn out to be one funny chap! Just don’t get yourself into trouble with teachers so often okay?

KK! Thanks for the lollipop that I never fail to get every week! You are one helpful person, my friend. Thanks for always volunteering to carry the placard, the loudhailer, my bag, food and whatnots. The extra pair of hands was always appreciated. Continue to take initiative yea? Hope everything goes well with you and that special person! ;)

Andy.. Another super helpful guy. Thanks for all the help you offered. And you’re super lame as well! Eh you girls stop bullying him ah. Haha!

Wee Sern! You ah always stuck in a corner with Shi Lei. Haha. I think you two blend well with each other. Wee Sern’s craziness mellowed by Shi Lei’s stoic grace. Well I can’t say much I dunno you guys too well!

Jingru! You’re the bubbliest girl I know! You were the first person to notice that I wasn’t in a very good mood, even when I wasn’t showing a sour face. And I thank you for noticing and trying to cheer me up. Not everybody has the knack to sense people’s emotions.

Miao Peng! I think you’re a very level-headed person. You care for those around you more than yourself and I think that’s honourable and admirable. Just be sure to know your limits okay? And thanks for trying to cheer me up that day. It well did. ☺

Clare! You got me (and Wen Xuan!) worried sick that day when you went missing! Where did you go anyway? Didn’t get the chance to ask. Anyway, you’re a great person to have conversations with!

Xie Jing! I’ll never forget you simply because you, err, eat mayonnaise. Haha! I’m so sorry that I lost your Singapore Idol autographed poster. I swear it wasn't in my bag when I checked it. It might've dropped out, unless somebody took it, which I doubt so. There are a lot of things in my bag: valuables, water bottles, etc. You know how I dump everything that’s given to me in there. But don’t fret. One day I'll join Singapore Idol and give you MY signed poster ok? Haha kidding! I’m so sorry ok? I’ve been quite scatterbrained lately. I lost my camera cover too. And my iPod casing. Thank God none of your valuables went missing.

Dixin! You slipped the dollar coin in my bag didn’t you? Naughty! You are the more outspoken one and you acted like a beacon for the other half of the class. Your inquisitive nature is so endearing.

Verena… This one took me some time to write. Not because I have nothing to write about but you are just… deep, for the lack of a better word. I think you’re the most sensible person in class. Your ability to look very objectively at situations never cease to impress me. You have very matured views about issues and people, and I think it’s very rare to find teenagers like you expressing such views at such a tender age. Usually people tend to be biased and one-sided but you are capable of seeing the better side of people, the aim of the whole game, the grand design haha. Okay I may be exaggerating but I can see that in you. Other than that, I remembered that you were the one that tended to Katherine when she fell. I think that’s a commendable act. And oh, I think you have great taste in music! Yay for that! Haha!

Katherine! You’re such a quiet girl! You know, I’m kinda glad you fell into the drain. No! I don’t mean it that way. If you hadn’t, I wouldn’t have known you existed! ☺

Zhao Da. You never get bored of army stuff do you? Haha! I think if you have such a huge interest in the army, life for you there won’t be so bad after all! I wish you all the best!

Ya Wen! Thanks for all the pictures!

Jun Qi! I’m glad I didn’t lose your valuables. I have to admit I was quite reluctant of holding on to it at first but then, some teachers are just a pain in the… you know where. Thanks for being the first one to actually trust me with your stuff.

Okay I’m gonna summarise the rest of you real quick but by no means am I discrediting you okay? It’s just that time didn’t allow me to get to know you better. Nonetheless I wanna say my sincere thanks for making my stay in Nan Hua memorable and enjoyable.

The rest of the girls: Xue Fen, Elaine, Wei Ru, Zhi Qing, Kelly, Jasmine, Likhoon, Yan Hui, Hui Juan, Jing Shi, Chu Hui, Rachel, Hui Rong, Xiaohui. I just didn’t have the chance to get to know you better. I still remember the first day when I was marking attendance and I was walking around looking at each and everyone of you, you girls were so shy! (Or couldn’t be bothered? I wouldn’t know better.) Practically all of you avoided eye contact with me! Haha.

The guys: Gong Yi, Kaiwen, Hao Chen, Jun Hao, Jianloon, Zi Zhao. Well what can I say; you guys are different each week. Some days you guys get so crazy especially when Hong Xuan hypes everybody up with whatever’s on TV Mobile hahaha. Other days you guys are so so quiet.

Once again I’d like to say thanks for being such an enjoyable class to be with. Makes me so envious that I didn’t have such a good time in my secondary school.

One point to note, I realised that generally you complain a lot about why teachers hate 206 and I think that that’s a good thing. It builds your class spirit, having something in common to bitch about. Can you imagine if Ms Yap wasn’t Ms Yap? Shu Huan would have nothing to bitch about! Haha! Don’t take it the wrong way and start bitching everybody now haha. What I mean is that what this class has that others lack from what I notice is class spirit/identity and you should be proud that 206 is famous, even for the wrong reasons. Now that you have the attention, all you guys need to do is turn the table around and prove to the teachers that you can do well in life, even when you’re ‘noisy’, ‘naughty’, or whatever they call you. And if/WHEN you survive the whole ordeal, you can finally say to teachers/people/yourself that you did more than just study. You have a life and you have friends and you have an AWESOME class. One day you will look back and realise how fun school is, with all the teachers getting on your nerves. Now what’s even more important is that you have to prove to yourself that you can do it, as an individual and as a class and I for one thing believe that you guys can achieve that. Whoa look at me preaching. Haha. Having said that, I wish your class 206 all the best in life and good luck!

It was a long journey we had together, from rehearsals in school to rehearsals in the stadium to SYF to more rehearsals and countless previews and finally NDP itself. Finally, I GET MY SATURDAYS BACK!! Haha! Well, I will suffer some withdrawal symptoms from not having rehearsals on Saturdays and not meeting you guys and everything. Like I said, you guys were like my sanctuary from stupid people. But then again it’s time for us to put what’s past behind us and relish our free weekends once again!

What I’ll remember most will be the countless amount of poking fun at each other (who likes who now? heheh..) and the laughter and the drama and Ms. Yap and the teachers and you. You guys were the best thing that ever happened to me in my 2 years of army.

And with that, I’ll see you guys around! Here’s to the universe’s best class: 206’06!

And oh, will you guys stop saying ISH ISH ISHKANDAR like it’s a bad thing?? Haha!

From your universe’s best AI,
Isk.

...mixed feelings of inspiration and hopelessness...

2004-06-26T22:04:00.000+08:00

Sunday, 20/6/2004
0045h

I am reading Veronika Decides to Die by Paulo Coelho and I just watched Homeless to Harvard from the Hallmark Channel and something struck me. I’ve gotten these chords struck before, many times, and every time I think about it, I get these mixed feelings of inspiration and hopelessness. I was immensely moved and touched by Liz, how she managed to put her everything into reaching her goal, into fitting herself into a place where her “kind” outwardly condemns and making sure she gets what she wants despite her difficulties. I mean Homeless to Harvard is based on a true story. And so the cliched thought came across my mind “If she could do it, so can I.” Heck she was homeless. And she managed to cram fours years of study into two! And she got a scholarship (which I feel is just a charity work from New York Times) which she truly deserves. Maybe the American education system is simpler. Maybe I’m being ridiculous but hell yeah I’m jealous. And I’m proud of her at the same time. And I want to work as hard as her. And don’t you think it’s funnily uncanny how she reminds me of Rory Gilmore, and Rory was accepted to Harvard. And I want to go to Harvard.

Veronika decides to die because her life was at its peak. She wants to die because she realised the fact that after that point of time, she’s going to grow old, get sick and be lonely and by that time, she’ll be too afraid to commit suicide because then, she will have responsibilities being a mother. It’s ironic because people usually want to die because they are suffering in one way or another but Veronika wants to die because she was at the happiest moments of her life.

It got me thinking, what am I going to do with my life? I must say I really admire the determination these characters exude. To get to Harvard, or to… die. At least they have a goal. Me, I’m just floating around, trying hard to study, admiring Norah Jones and her success story (I just watched Norah Jones “Feels Like Home” TV Special on MTV) and awed by the resemblance of her and someone I used to have a thing for. Heh.. Sweet memories..

But Homeless to Harvard gave me the slap in the face I need. I really want to do well this time. And I want to wake up to Norah Jones tomorrow morning. And Thora Birch is wow. And can’t wait for Gilmore Girls.